Breathing Fire: The Heat Between Us

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Greetings beloveds,

The weather is warming. The days getting longer. Our dreams getting brighter. During this time when we wonder what the next day will bring on a global, institutional, macro level how do we find a space that allows for us to love ourselves and each other radically? This is a question I have been grappling with for some time. I speak often of self-care and self-love through acts such as baths, healthy eating, movement, ritual and love but what of sex? How does this very literal coming together of our physical beings provide a space for healing between ourselves and each other?

Perhaps this is not an act of healing and self-care generally discussed because it is so nuanced. Sex can be a topic wrought with attachments that span the scale of emotions, ideas, and belief systems. It is never a simple physical act simple in it’s execution as say a  meditation, bath/shower, nap or a walk. Yet, the benefits that sexual intercourse offers to us such as improved mood, stress relief, light/heavy aerobic activity, and improved immunity should be reason enough to engage in this energetic exchange. Yet, it is that exchange and the power that comes from it which causes one to truly understand the need to be balanced and particular about engaging in this act.

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All forms of interaction are energetic exchanges, but the power of creation that is available through sexual communion is unlike any other except for deep meditative/spiritual practices. While you may equate creation when connected to sex as the formation of another living being, let us increase our state of awareness so that we recognize that ALL is a part of creation. Our thoughts, dreams, desires, material belongings, physical bodies, everything. All that which exists known and unknown are due to the energy of creation. When I speak of the 12 Universal laws, new/full moon rituals, or feng-shui, these all carry the ability to bring forth that which we desire. The same rings true for sex.

During the act of a sexual coupling whether with one’s self or another, there is a build up of energy that is then released through the orgasm or may just be spread throughout the beings interacting as not all couplings end in orgasm. Generally this energy is not directed towards a specific outcome other than the drive for pleasure and release. Sometimes there may be an intent set for a child. Yet we limit ourselves on what we can create in that moment. Homes, furniture, cars, food, experiences, even wisdom can come forth from sexual intercourse/ interactions. This energy can also be channeled to heal and transmute pain, trauma, and anger. Yet, because there is long history of shame, guilt, fear, and moralizing attached to sexual expression it can be difficult to use this act for the purpose of health and well-being not only for one’s self but for the world around us.

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One must access how they conceptualize change and transformation. They may need to spend quite some time examining what counts as a form of medicine and therapy? Shift their beliefs from that of the limited duality of right/wrong to infinite possibilities and variations. For yes, just as one can use the energy generated through sex to create they can also destroy and harm others. This is evident as forms of sexual assault, abuse, mistreatment, discrimination and other forms of prejudice continue to thrive in the world resulting in inequality and power dynamics. Thus the “rules” about determining, with whom, when, where, how, and why one has sex are not necessarily unwarranted given what can come from it. Yet, do we wish to feed the energy of connection and love or that of separation and fear?

Sex is transformative. As an individual will you use this energy to create? As a society will we use this energy for love? As a global community will we use this energy to heal and ascend? It is up to us to determine these answers. You can though at this very moment choose love. To love yourself and others. To set healthy boundaries and uphold them with the wisdom of MAAT. To hold space for yourself and those who need support. If you find yourself experiencing bouts of fear, anxiety, or anger where could this energy take a moment to access where this energy goes? Is it to another person, belief, system, or yourself? Be mindful of what you give your energy to. There is great power within you that is yours to do with as you wish. Charge yourself by cycling your energy through your breath back into your own form. Direct it towards an external desire or ask for guidance on a concern or topic. The key is to know that is is yours!

I love you all and never want you to taken advantage of. You are all such powerful beings. Know this at your core.





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